Do you have a goal you’d like to achieve this year?
Do you need help in figuring out the steps to plan?
If you said “yes” to any of these then How often do we have a goal and wish we could restart? Well today we can…. #PTSDandBeyond
A reboot is for computers. We aren’t computers. Starting a new year we can establish new goals by an easy 3 Step Process – this week’s #PTSDandBeyond we discuss, share, and go through: Refocus, Restart, and ReZooom!
One main and well known challenge is that there’s so much focus about what people do wrong with goal setting. This focus on what goes wrong doesn’t help. It’s counter to getting a person motivated. In today’s world of chaos, our heads don’t need more of what’s wrong – instead, we need more focus on people trying. More support to keep the momentum going. More cheers at successes AND mistakes (it’s how we learn).
Serious question: How much time are you willing to invest in your Mental Health recovery?
In a recent poll on #PTSDandBeyond we did on Twitter, 94% of respondents said “what ever it takes” where 3% of respondents checked “one year investment” and another 3% checked “6 sessions.”
How much time are you willing to invest? Since you’re here, that means some time. And I applaud you for doing so; for taking this time and spending it together, for investing in yourself, and hopefully you’ll get some nuggets of information to try, use, and benefit.
What does it mean to refocus on a goal? Why not set New Year’s Resolutions like everyone else?
Refocusing on a goal means revisiting our “why.” Why did we start, the enthusiasm, and determination? We revisit goals to see if the goal still applies, if we need to make adjustments, or if it applies to your life. Another thing to consider is even goals that have been shelved can get a new life – maybe the timing wasn’t right. Maybe the right time is now.
What can we do to refocus?
There’s 2 Things to do to Refocus:
1. Reconnect w/your why
2. Uncover the root cause of why momentum fizzled out
Where do we start and how do we begin?
There’s a lot of research and publications that say: Start here. Start Now! A thought to consider is when we restart, we can wipe the slate clean. Every day is a new beginning; a new slate. If we want to start what are things that get in the way and be helpful to be mindful?
A couple tips to keep in mind when starting and beginning.
1. Don’t over think
2. Don’t dwell on the past
3. Do Start now.
4. Do Restart every day.
5. Do Start with 1 thing and the small buckets
@IamButOneVoice shares these tips with our #PTSDandBeyond Community, they say “where does not matter, now is the time. “Now” can change from moment to moment. And if we fall, we can pic ourselves us and dust ourselves off and start all over again.” @IamButOneVoice makes several helpful points as this time of year people focus on the start and start out of the gate hard but then lose momentum which is why the gym is packed right now but will be empty come mid-February. It doesn’t matter when we start, just that we do. It doesn’t matter how many times we get back up and restart; as long as we do GET UP and take the steps moving forward.
Believe in yourself. The greatest lie we tell ourselves is that we won’t succeed. The most certain way to succeed is to keep trying no matter how many times – keep trying one more time.
What type of goals are there? There are 6 common types of goals: increase, make, improve, reduce, save, and develop – whether something or someone – all 6 can apply. Pick 1 then build up to add another. Again, when people focus on doing too much – then achieving can become overwhelming. The key is to find your Goldilocks – your “just right” and do that!
Goals are intended to focus your attention and resources on what’s most important to you!
What steps are necessary?
The steps to create goals allows people to be creative. Whether establishing goal statements or a vision board, the main thing is to focus first on the end state – not the tasks. First, envision the end, then develop the how to steps and tasks. Jumping right into the how to steps, a person may miss the envisioned state – what does it look like and how will we get there? Focus first on the what it looks like when achieved then the steps to get there.
@HolisticFF shares, “Look at the why, even if it is a general statement, and then make the general become more specific. We all have certain innate talents/strengths to offer this world which will be the guiding beacon in writing more specific goals.” These are excellent tips – where looking at the “why” as a general statement then keep asking “why” and take those responses to make the general into a specific statement.
What about personality types? Where do they come into the picture?
@LimbicRes asks, “Do you find different types are just easier for different personalities specifically or is there some randomness to what type people are most comfortable starting with?” @LimbicRes poses an excellent question! How often do we go to a training workshop where participants are asked to identify their personality types and then use that information as a compass to be understanding themselves? All information is a starting point or to add to or adjust what we know. It’s NOT an end-all-be-all. Take snippets including from this information and use parts that make sense. For personality types, some research would show this as some assessments like DISC, MBTI, however, at some point a person needs to begin – start with where you’re comfortable. The point is to just start and begin. Another point is that we are more than just our personality; our personality is one part but not all of who we are.
So, the obvious next question is: How do we plan? The S.M.A.R.T system is easy to remember, easy to use, and effective! S.M.A.R.T. is an acronym for
S – Specific – focus and clear
M – Measurable – what gets measured, gets done
A – Achievable – realistic
R- Relevant – purposeful for now – makes sense now
T – Timebound – specific target date
@LimbicRes gives an example of how they use the S.M.A.R.T. system; Breaking away from the “perfectionist” mode many #PTSDandbeyond sufferers have & giving oneself small, achievable goals. I try to break a task, like dinner, into small steps with the above S.M.A.R.T. system – like focus on just cutting asparagus, etc. & being present.
Absolutely. An achievable goal can be small goals then building up to bigger goals. Another key point to note is that with a series of “wins” a person develops the confidence to take on larger and more complex goals. Look for ways to give yourself small and achievable goals.
Achieving goals involves something else that’s not talked about and needs to; Assessing, reflection, adjusting…. all part of goals. One thing that I learned is that adjusting is part of the process and it’s okay to adjust. Think of adjusting like adapting, modifying, tweaking something. Sometimes a person who’s ready to quit on a goal because they’re frustrated gets re-motivated on their goal when making an adjustment.
After planning, the next essential component is follow through. This part is where people struggle the most. How do we keep and maintain our follow through? @HolisticFF shares some tips, “Planning and re-focus when you stumble. Do not get frustrated or throw in the towel. Put the pen to paper to see what works and does not. Ask for feedback from those in a trusted circle.” Whether belonging to a formal group, informal group, an accountability buddy…there’s several ways to follow through. @RebuildLife shares 4 additional tips: persistence, grit, problem-solving, permission to fail. Permission to fail can look like many different things including adjustment or shelving a goal – remember the “R” in the S.M.A.R.T. goals – is it relevant today?
Accountability is linked to follow through. When we have an accountability buddy or group, we can share our challenges, get feedback and insights that we may not have thought of, and destroy procrastination and help self-defeating thoughts. Plus, you’ll do the same for them! I’ve often said, “Accountability is a contract for yourself – keeping a promise to yourself can increase self-confidence AND goal achievement!”
Then there’s the derail…what can we do when life give an extreme derail? Life is always gonna throw derails.
Remember the CTL +ALT + DEL formula
1. What can you control
2. What alternatives/changes/options can be used
3. What can be let go/gotten rid of
Also, who we hang out has a great influence on achieving our goal; here’s some tips for a tribe check:
Awareness – You become who you hang out with.
Value – Let go of toxic relationships
Place – Change the environment
Senses – What are you watching – reading, videos, music – all of this influences our mindset and success
Lastly, are you the influence that is keeping you from reaching your goals, your potential, your dreams? One of the greatest challenges is ourselves. I struggle with this one too. Sometimes we are our own barrier. Be mindful and have a support person to point out “hey! you’re being negative” Negativity is toxic to any goal.
So, how will you use this information on Refocus, Restart, and ReZoom? 83% of people in a poll said they’d get to it an use the information now and after reviewing. So, how about you? How will you use it? Comment below and we’ll see you next time!